Wednesday 4 September 2013
Oliver's 100 Word Challenge - Week 1
Running as fast as I could, I pelted through the dark forest. I risked looking back, and yes, they were still following. I put my hands in my pocket and pulled my sword out. It glowed even though there was no light shining through the leaves that belonged to the collosal trees. I hid behined the closest one and let the first monster pass, as soon as it had I jumped out and stabbed it in the back. No sooner had my bronze blade touched it, it turned to dust. I climbed the tree and watched them pass. Suddenly I hered a crack......
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You have used some great vocabulary here Ollie. I like how your writing has a fast pace to it just like you are being chased. Maybe have a think about where you could insert the odd comma to separate parts of some of your sentences.
ReplyDeleteWell done.
Mrs Prior
Well done, Ollie, a fast-paced exciting adventure for your 100WC. Good descriptions - the bronze sword, the colossal trees - really help to make the piece more interesting. Check on your spelling and typing just to make sure you correct any errors.
ReplyDeleteTrish Burgess (Team 100WC)
Nice 100 challenge!!
ReplyDeleteGreat 100 word challenge Ollie. Lots of suspension and great description ,very tense.
ReplyDelete